Most of us have heard some version of that sentence – sometimes shouted, sometimes whispered, sometimes delivered with a smirk that lingers long after the words fade. Your amygdala, the brain’s alarm bell, wants to replay it on a loop, to keep you “safe” by bracing for the next blow. But survival mode isn’t where your future is built. The work is to interrupt that loop and give the rest of your brain – your reason, your values, your vision – room to lead.
Start by naming it: “That was an attack, not the truth.” Labelling lowers the heat. Then translate the sting into data: What I did do is not who am I? If there’s a skill gap, identify one specific action that shrinks it – one call, one page, one rep. Momentum beats rumination every time.
Remember: you are not an audition for your detractors. Don’t burn your energy trying to convince them. Use the energy to convince yourself. Build evidence you can’t argue with: a streak of small, kept promises. Ten quiet mornings of practice. Three tough conversations handled with composure. Progress measured in private is still progress; it’s often the most durable kind.
Rewrite the message in your own voice: “I’ve been underestimated, not defined.” Let that be a challenge to your habits, not your worth. Replace the “never” with a timeline you control: today’s step, this week’s goal, the month’s review. Track it. Celebrate it. When the amygdala drags the old tape back, press play on proof: your logbook of effort, your stack of finished pages, your calm under pressure.
And forgive your past self for the moments you froze or fumbled. Strength isn’t the absence of weak moments; it’s the decision not to make them your identity. You don’t have to be louder than the insult. You have to be longer. Outlast it with discipline. Outgrow it with learning. Outshine it by staying the course.
You are not here to prove them wrong. You are here to prove yourself right.
Bouncing back matters!
Abdulhussain Tejani
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